How to get past saying “I CAN’T” about your creativity

At some time in your creative life, I am guessing you have said these same two little  words “I can’t”.

When facing something in your creative life, whether it be an obstacle,  problem, deep desire, or new idea….how often have you found yourself saying….

• I can’t go because….
• I can’t tell that to my boss, wife, children, partner because….
• I can’t get my work into galleries because….
• I can’t make it as an artist because…
• I can’t afford to….
• I can’t go to art school because….
• I can’t sell myself as a screenwriter/dancer/artist/poet because ….
• I can’t because I’m too ….

Maybe you don’t ever actually utter the words “I can’t”…but do you ever say one of these more palatable or gentle expressions for I can’t?

• I’m not able to…
• I wish I could but…
• I could if…
• I would like to but…

Ok, let’s get something straight here. If you have ever said “I can’t”  (or another version of it) about your creativity, you are STILL creating.

Every time you THINK or SAY the words I can’t (or a version), you ARE CREATING a mindset surrounding your creativity. (and… it’s not the one you want)

What you ARE creating are negative beliefs preventing you from EVER creating what you really want.

You know…your thoughts and words have great power over your actions.

Saying I can’t is filled with gi-normous, huge, creative-dreams-and-life-killing power.

Every time you say I CAN’T,  you believe it. And your creativity believes it.

My I CAN’T story:

I once said “I can’t be an artist because I didn’t go to art school.” I believed it. I convinced myself of it.  I anguished about how much I wanted to paint and be known as an artist. I spent years blaming others for not encouraging my artistic abilities. I supported other artists who were creating products (even though they didn’t go to art school). I  told my story over and over about how I really wanted to go to art school and I created SO many excuses to why I still couldn’t do it. I believed that without an art degree, I had no right to even call myself a wanna-be artist. I found others who supported this negative belief and consoled me by saying things like “We all have things we wish we did differently”.

OUCH. I really damaged my creativity with these I CAN’T beliefs I was creating. And I didn’t even know it.

As much as I wanted to really embrace my life as a creative spirit, there was no way I was going to succeed until I removed the “I can’t” phrase from my vocabulary. I had to realize that saying “I can’t” would never support my creativity because it only supported my fears.

Does this feel or sound familiar for you?

Ready to get to a place where you create a positive mindset for creativity and support yourself?

How  YOU can get past saying “I CAN’T”

1. Awareness. Pay attention to how you talk and think. Catch yourself saying “I can’t” or “I wish I could” or “If only I…” and name it for what it is.  Saying I CAN’T is a belief you have created that is getting in the way of you creating your life the way you want. Become aware of it.  Every time you think or say “I can’t”, say to yourself…Ok, negative beliefs, I am aware of you.  I’m aware of you right now.

**Become aware that ” I CAN’T” is a roadblock preventing you from taking action.

2. Acknowledge that you might have really deep fears or beliefs that support the reasons why you can’t do or think something. You may not be ready to challenge these deeper beliefs or face the underlying fears. Here again, name it. Instead of using I can’t as an excuse, acknowledge you have other things that are keeping you back.

For me, saying “I can’t be an artist because I didn’t go to art school.” was really about my fears of not being good enough, not wanting to fail, and not having self confidence that I could be successful without the label of art-school-graduate.

3. Change the Language. If you really still feel like you “can’t”, begin by changing the language you are using. Prevent yourself from uttering the words “I can’t”. Discipline yourself if you have to and hold yourself accountable. DO NOT let these words slip off your tongue or enter your mind. Yes, you can do this.  You do this by owning your REAL feelings, beliefs, and choices.

You CAN really do, think, and feel anything you want. You CAN create the life you want….BUT…. instead of saying “I can’t” say

Instead say

• “I don’t want to”
  
• “I choose not to”
• “I won’t”
  

Saying I CAN’T is a choice. And you always have a choice.

Instead of saying,” I just can’t approach galleries because I don’t have a portfolio”…. SAY, “I don’t want to approach galleries because I don’t have an adequate portfolio. ”

Be intentional with your language. Say what you really mean and not hide behind an I CAN’T excuse.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not a Pollyanna here. I’m not saying it’s easy or you won’t have hurdles beyond hurdles to overcome.  I KNOW some of the deep beliefs and fears we have to overcome are HUGE.

I just want you to own it. It’s not that  YOU CAN’T…. it’s that maybe right now it’s not the right time or  you need to  choosing a different course or path.

Now, if you really can’t just erase the phrase “I can’t” from your mind or speech, a great approach is to tack on at the end something like “right now” or “for now”.

Instead of saying,” I just can’t approach galleries because I don’t have a portfolio”…. SAY, “I can’t approach galleries because I don’t have a portfolio right now. “  This gives you an “out” that you can begin to believe you CAN (when you are ready to address all the other stuff too).

4. Practice and take responsibility. Just do it . Pronounce to yourself and others that you are NOT going to say “I can’t” anymore.  You may not even realize just how ingrained this phrase is in your beliefs and thoughts until you practice

Begin with becoming aware, acknowledging your use the phrase, and choosing to not say it. Take back the power from “I can’t” and you will find these steps will empower you say I CAN to your creativity and its expression.

“Man often becomes what he believes himself to be. If I keep on saying to myself that I cannot do a certain thing, it is possible that I may end by really becoming incapable of doing it. On the contrary, if I have the belief that I can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to do it even if I mau not have it at the beginning.”
-Mahatma Gandhi

1. Are you making art or making excuses?| Awaken Creativity Are you making time and the commitment to your creativity or are you making excuses? Geesh…that’s a harsh title to this post but really, when...
2. What are you creating when you can’t create anything? | Awaken Creativity Sometimes it’s just hard to feel creative. The kids won’t go to bed, the dog just got sick in your kitchen, the bathroom hasn’t been...